MY FAVORITE TEEN PARTY MOVIES

This is a list of my favorite Teen Party movies. Each film on this list is a gem. They are the best, the assiest, the horniest, the most hilarious movies ever made. These movies are important. We need them. We need them to remind us that we were young once.
They were a major influence on my new book, THE PARTY LORDS.

SIXTEEN CANDLES

Take out the cheesy romance between Molly Ringwald and that other douche, and Sixteen Candles is just a hilarious and sleazy party comedy. The foreign exchange student gets all drunk and hooks up with a female weight lifter. A nerd drives around drunk and hooks up with the prom queen. A house gets thrashed. The movies just a good time.

PROJECT X

I saw this little disaster in the theatre and all I could think was like, fuck, teenagers are Goddamn terrifying. I felt so old. So out of touch. This generation of teenagers party so hard. Or at least the kids in this movie do. This is the wildest party movie ever made. This movies like Saved By the Bell  got dry humped by Gummo. Dry humped hard as fuck.

SUPER BAD

Jonah Hill is so good at playing a teenager. I wish he was still down with playing a seventeen year old in movies.

21 JUMP STREET

Well, Jonah Hill doesn’t play a teenager in this movie. He plays a cop going undercover in a high school. Good enough. Strangely, it’s not Jonah hill who carries this movie though. It’s his co-star, Channing Tatum. God damn, Channing Tatum is so God damn handsome and charismatic. I have such a crush on him. I mean my wife has such a crush on him. Anyway, this movie is hilarious. Much better than the TV show. The TV show sucked. It’s was like Saved By The Bell meets Law And Order. (I have a weird love hate thing with Saved By The Bell).

RISKY BUSINESS

Part of what makes this movie so great is the soundtrack. It’s done by Tangering Dream and its dreamy as hell. I also love how morally ambiguous the movie is. It’s about the love between a teenage boy and high scale prostitute. And the movie makes no direct stand on the issue of prostitution and I love that.

PORKYS

I should hate this movie. It’s basically about a bunch of rich kids fucking with poor people. It’s like the movie The Outsiders turned inside out. Its like Saved By The Bell beating up on the cast from Roseanne. Still, it’s so funny and written with so much heart. I love this film. No matter how pro rich kid it is.

AMERICAN PIE: BETA HOUSE

This movie barely has a plot. What plot exists, is just plain dumb. But the movie is hilarious and the actors seem like they are having the best time ever making it. It’s a gem. I prefer this movie to the original American Pie movies. It’s one of the most ridiculous, most over the top movies ever made. And there is so much nudity. You see full frontal dangly labia in like the first ten minutes. I love dangly labia.

ENCINO MAN

Cavemen are awesome at partying. Pauly Shore is awesome at partying. THIS MOVIE IS AWSOME AT PARTYING!

DAZED AND CONFUSED

I love the creepy old dude in this movie. He’s such a chill master. And he’s really not that creepy. The movie doesn’t focus on him needing to move on or not being a molester. It kinda glorifies his creepy older dude status. And I really appreciate that.

CALIGULA

This movie has so much partying in it. It’s about a young  man’s brief, but awesome term as Czar. This young lad loves to party. Warning: There are some really disturbing scenes in this movie. But, for the most part, it’s just a good old time. Being a teenage much have been fun back in the day. At least it was if you were a Czar.